The Wannabe Dickriders
|Did you mean The Dickriders?|
The following gems of humanity are those who not only wish to be figurative dickriders, but literal ones as well. For these folks are so obsessed with anything Coughlan that after gleaning through most of their online content, you couldn't have a single doubt that they want to ride The Dick in the real. Let's begin with:
The Mad Shangi
Talks about Coughlan almost as often as he breathes (which, shockingly, is not even a fraction of the next guy), this dying alone 30-year old obscure internet troll has failed to get Coughlan prosecuted for copyright infringement, and partakes in the schemes concocted by his fellow "Capital 'A' Atheist" retards Vindicator & Raoul Demarest. He also can't help but portray himself as a hilariously insecure manchild on relationship forums calling others "fags" and "niggers" when they laugh at him, or simply point out the errors in his unabashedly disturbed mindset. Did we mention that he's an MRA who bears many of the same traits of the late Elliot Rodger?
As previously stated, Shangi, in his ever-present obsession with anything Coughlan-related and his projects revolving around it, has displayed a willingness to make transparent edits to anything that could show how pathetic he is. Anyone who writes satire, as he calls it, (which he doesn't think goes both ways, as evidenced by his edit history) about him is just a fanboy of Coughlan regardless of evidence. After all, Mr. "All Women Are Whores" needs to be able to take some to give some (he obviously can't). A full-on attack of censorship is in due order no doubt.
One could only ask, in the most civil manner possible, just what Coughlan had done to warrant such an obsessive effort as the original The Dickriders page, from which this page was originally derived. It's likely that Coughlan, through his welfare checks from the UK government, once traveled to Calgary (the city full of pretentious country fans, oil industry slaves, and once-a-year cowboys (The Stampede) that he calls home) and touched him inappropriately, but Shangi would probably fly into a fit of incoherent tard rage instead of telling you anything. But because he's a Jew, you shouldn't believe a word his greedy ass says anyway even if he could form a sentence intelligible by sentient human minds.
According to his ED page, this is an apt description of the irrelevance that is TheMadShangi:
Shangi is stupid enough to have picked this username for
his PlentyOfFish profile has bravely deleted his profile because he is now dating his brother , and the following quote is a lulzworthy chunk of sex-repressed, friend-zoned rage directed at women:
In his usual fashion of flipping out and acting like he's above the drama he keeps on instigating, he updated his PlentyOfFish description to read:
If MadShangi thinks people won't find dirt on him on his PlentyOfFish profile, then he clearly doesn't understand what he's writing. He rages about not getting anywhere beyond a one-night stand with women from Plenty of Fish, then rages about how easy it was to find his public humiliation of a POF profile. But what can you expect from a guy who keeps hoping that Coughlan will mention him again while Shangi wastes bandwidth on the internet with sleep-inducing interviews on his dead radio show? Patrick lives off of petty drama, even by ED standards, around the interwebz so all one has to do is deprive him of it, and maybe this failure will go an hero from the silence.
MadShangi is also well known for his overt racism and misogyny. These character traits are so rampant that it got him removed from the membership roles of AVoiceforMen, a website that was declared to be a hate site by the Southern Poverty Law Center. He forwards rumors of Jewish supremacy so stupid that members of Stormfront had debunked them. This luser is a lulzcow.
Rockefellers are Jews
Last Thursday Patrick decided to spout his usual MRA rhetoric about how feminism is evol and is connected to Jews or some shit. Here are the inane Twitter ramblings of a lonely lunatic who has never smelled a pussy except the day he was born, and when they tried to put him back again.
The closeted lover of all things Coughlan, Vindicator is a downright mentally ill, or legally insane at least, individual who has achieved a very
notable distinction of having made over 80 videos about Coughlan in fucking a year. Vindicator always, in any videos he makes about Coughlan, bullshits what few viewers he has with lies like, "I don't give a shit about Coughlan" or "I don't want any more drama", in spite of the fact that he can't stop contradicting himself on either because he keeps generating both. If he ever states any of the previously mentioned lines in a video or tweet, rest assured that he will put out yet another video or tweet about the shitty low-rent comedian.
This same gem of humanity went so far as to invoke his niece, whom is allegedly dying of cancer, all in order to "shame" Coughlan for whining about his life. Vindicator requires drama with Coughlan in order to sustain his miserable excuse for a life, and that was the entire basis of bringing up his niece's ailment to remind Coughlan that he doesn't have it so shitty as an at-times mooching D-list comedian. The two had a video exchange about this, yet unfortunately because Vindicator is a chickenshit pussy & Coughlan's channels had been flagged off of YouTube, neither videos from either one of them can currently be viewed on YouTube.
Yet to this day, all you have to do is take a short breath and you can expect Vindicator to talk about Coughlan in that same time-frame. None of it can hide the fact, though, that in spite of Vindicator's inability to court Coughlan like any normal person can, the man so desperately craves being the literal bottom in their relationship. After all, how else can you explain making several dozen videos about a low rank internet celebrity with so little relevance as Coughlan?
When he's not thirsting for the juice of Coughlan, he's instead, and weirdly enough, craving his alternative in thunderf00t should he continue to fail in attracting Coughlan. In spite of the thick neck, hobo facial hair, gravelly voice, and enormous case of dishonesty and bigotry, Vin has taken an on-again/off-again liking to Phil Mason whenever he feels that he's alienated himself from Coughlan's good graces too much.
His Continued Obsession
While Vindicator will be quick to say "I don't care about Coughlan anymore lulz" or something of the sort, his video count about Coughlan has risen to over 100 videos. In a two year time-frame. If he doesn't feel like recording another inane, sleep-inducing video rant about his love/hate interest, he trots out edited screencaps of Coughlan's facebook posts, in which he uses typo-ridden text & arrows to waste precious internetz for this endeavor. Y'know, instead of hitting on the guy like any normal person with his mindset. Otherwise, he dances like the sexually-confused monkey that he is with almost no effort, inadvertently perpetuating his lolcow status while he denies it with such statements as "I won" or "I'm right" or derivatives of such.
Here's one of many, many, MANY examples of poorly conceived tweet responses he's made (as of this writing) to Coughlan:
Helpful Advice for Vindicator
Just fucking ask him out already. You clearly pine for the guy, so why not smash your head with a ball-peen hammer to realign your mismatched brain cells so that you court him like a normal person? Until you do this, you're never going to be on the receiving end of his juice. Your loss, Vin.
His New Obsession
Well, he has two new obsessions.
The first is talking about anything to do with SJWs, mostly through his rather insane twitter feed. He's a gamergate supporter, and has shared links to many of the bullshit videos shat out by other gamergaters, regurgitating GamerGate talking points like the good little lackey he is. If he could just learn how to write anything that didn't resemble the type of content you'd expect from a person with Down syndrome, he'd probably have an audience worth a damn. It also doesn't help that his charisma is about on par with Brett Keane, hurt further by the fact that he has a thick British accent which hinders one's ability to even understand a word he says.
The second obsession, which has developed recently, is in his passive-aggressive feud with a user called UnseenPerfidy. Due to the pitiful fact that Vin is too pathetic to put his heart where his e-mouth is, he has been roundly defeated by responses made by UnseenPerfidy so far, and as a result Vin refers to his new arch-nemesis as "the SJW." It's almost as funny as Bill O'Reilly's former propensity to avoid referring to Keith Olbermann by name (during the latter's presence on MSNBC's evening lineup), except this is a guy who will get recognition by next to no one unlike that old fuck.
As his writing skills generate partially legible gibberish, bullshit, and nonsense in general, it is ill-advised to read his feed for over 9000 milliseconds. In that little window of time that is deemed safe for your sanity and whatever respect for the human race you may be holding onto, you are guaranteed to glean some content from him that firmly entrenches him in the ranks of the internet lolcow.
Raoul Demarest/Atheism Defended/AntiChristos11
For other information on this lunatic, go to his article.
If one wants to witness the physical manifestation of pot calling the kettle black, it's Raoul incessantly going after Coughlan. Given the lack of actual communique between the two as of the past year, it's really for no reason at this point. However, that doesn't stop Raoul from engaging in online activities so downright retarded that you couldn't be at fault for thinking his brain were sucked out of his skull. And to think that it's all just to perpetuate the drama with Coughlan started over a year ago. It is theorized that it may be the only reason he maintains any ounce of blood pumping through his veins. His wife is probably holed up in a dank shack somewhere while he scours the internet for any dirt, consequential or not, on Coughlan, his greatest enemy.
One would not be stretching the truth too much to theorize that he uses some kind of sock account generator of sorts, because he always seems to rear his ugly, bald, wrinkly head with some new account on Twitter or YouTube. This, or he's sadder than anyone could imagine; he really does put in so much time and effort into this drama that no one really cares about, but can't help but laugh at regardless.
In fact, recently he got caught doing the unthinkably stupid: he tweeted a link to a Stormfront thread bitching about Coughlan. It's okay to laugh at the silly thing's efforts, really.
How to troll the wannabe Dickriders
- Point out to Vindicator how many videos he has made about Coughlan in a year (it's in the realm of several dozen, currently).
- Proffer courtship advice to Vindicator because of his passive-aggressive, sexually-confused infatuation with Coughlan.
- Refer TheMadShangi to his own profiles on various dating sites wherein he rages about not having a girlfriend, not getting laid, and ending up with traps all the time.
- In accordance with above, compare him to Elliot Rodger and suggest he get proper treatment before he fails to get a high score.
- Or troll him with little effort in the usual ways (just read the various profiles that belong to the guy, he makes it look like kindergarten class) and maybe he'll make an attempt at beating Elliot Rodgers.
- Remind the denizens of Patrick's former MRA platform AVoiceForMen that he wrote content for the site. He really was, and still is so bad that many will deny his prior existence there.
- Notify them that they're wasting their time obsessing over a low-ranking comedian who is just slightly less obscure than themselves.
- Remind them that their failed attempts to get Coughlan in trouble for his cover song fiasco fell on deaf ears and they did everything wrong.
- Bring up the epic takedown Raoul suffered when he pulled his "religion is a mental illness" bullshit.
- Ask Raoul virtually any personal question, for it is liable to send him into an epic tardrage. Bonus points if he predictably attacks you in a personal way while acting like he's above such petty tricks.
- Kindly ask Patrick John Doran to cover up his gigantic Jewnose in all of his pictures.
- Avoid the shithole that Patrick John Doran calls home, a place in Canada called Calgary. You're better off not going there and getting killed because of uncooked red meat sold EVERYWHERE, getting run over by azns haphazardly driving its roads, or getting beaten to a pulp by Listerine addicts just for being white, both of which are overpopulating the place.
- Point out to Vin the lies, complete nonsense, and bevvy of typographical errors present in his Twitter-bound text replies to various users around the internet. Not a single one seen so far is safe from criticism of any of the aforementioned criteria, and then some.
- Refer Vindicator to the subsection describing advice for how to take Coughlan's cock up his ass.
- Although he has yet to exhibit the same degree of obsession (emphasis on yet) towards UnseenPerfidy that he has towards Coughlan, suggest ways for which Vindicator can properly approach his target for the sex that he so craves, wherein he is, again, the bottom in the relationship.