Criss Angel

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Be glad they cut the image off at the waist

Criss Angel is a contemporary street magician and STD incubator who makes 16 year old girls and sexless emo/scene-fags believe that he has supernatural powers. He is most famous for his show Mindfreak, on which he performs a variety of street magic, as well lurk moar for women as much as he can. Because of this, 16 year old girls, gays, and emo fags think he's the greatest thing since sliced bread.

TOW's Intelligence Strikes Again

From the Wikipedia talk page:

  • Angel isn't fake, in fact I'm 100% convinced he does have some supernatural power. Yes yes I know that the point of his illusions is make you think so, but some things he does is absolutely impossible by any means. In addition to his "panty-color predicting" trick, another one comes to mind: He takes a painted card out of a strictly ordinary painting...literally. When he takes it out, the card is no longer there, then he creases it, and puts it back, and it's painted with the crease, when it wasn't there originally. He also takes a $100 bill and a martini glass out of the painting, and again when he takes them out they're not in the painting. He then puts it back. And this is (as far as I can tell) a continuous camera shot, so there's no way the painting could have been replaced. That's my proof. I'd like to see a skeptic try to refute that trick. -Eridani 03:18, 31 May 2007 (UTC)
  • How about you leave? You're the one shoving your damn anti-Criss opinions {which no Criss fan here is buying, BTW} down everyone's throats. Here's an idea: if you hate Criss so much, don't watch his damn show, don't harrass his fans, just don't have anything to do with him. If I don't like something, I just don't involve myself in it. You should do the same. Simple solution.

Criss Angel Throwins a Fit and Being Butthurt

In February of 2002, Criss Angel hung from 8 fishhooks for 5 hours and 40 minutes in Times Square, setting a world record. On January 11th, 2008, Matt 'The Lord' Zane broke Criss Angel's record as he suspended for 6 hours from FOUR, not EIGHT, shark hooks in Las Vegas, Nevada. Angel was so butthurt by being outdone he banned everyone from talking about it on his message board, located here.

"It doesn't surprise me. Not only did I outlast him in terms of length I did it with only 4 hooks instead of 8. A lot of his fans wrote me and said it was impossible and there was no way I could last 6 hours. Well I did and now his fans have to admit that Criss isn't number one concerning one of his stunts. That generated a lot of speculation on his site to weather or not Criss would try to beat me. I don't think he is up for it and I believe he just wants this whole thing to go away."



—Matt Zane

You can go here to make Criss more butthurt by purchasing Zane's "Angel Killer" t-shirts.

Criss Angel the rip off artist

Criss Angel claims to be the first person to suspend himself from a helicopter by hooks, when, in fact, the stunt was first performed by Joey Strange, to whom Angel refuses to give credit for the idea and original stunt.

Criss was also the first person to play Russian Roulette live on TV. Outrageously, English mind-bender Derren Brown stole Criss' idea, then - to throw people off the scent - did it at least four years before Criss, and made it entertaining. Sadly, Angel failed to succeed at becoming an hero, and - after crying like a pussy in front of the fat shit from Korn - continues to make magic that's totally real and not faked, like turning off the entire planet's gravity for a year and finding some black person extra to go "OH SHI-" on camera like he isn't being given from fried chicken for his trouble.

>>Criss Angel'

Sold Out?

Cris Angel, butthurt over his apparent loss of popularity and revenue, has now taken to whoring out all his tricks in a Magic Kit [1]. Yes, he reveals all of his famous tricks, and includes the supplies needed to pretend to be a faggy magic emotard just like him.

External Links

Portal icon television.gif

Criss Angel is part of a series on


Visit the Media Portal for complete coverage.